Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Nightmares, nightmares

I've always had lots of nightmares. My mom (well, my great-granny, really) will say that's because I eat too many sweets before bed. I seriously don't remember ever having a happy dream until I was at least a teenager. One nightmare in particular even ended up being not scary because I kept having the exact same nightmare, only each time, more was added on to the end. It got to the point where I was excited at the beginning to see what was going to happen next and understood in the dream that it was a dream. The other big reoccurring theme is I cannot scream in a dream. I try and try and it's like a whisper, then I wake myself up because in real life I'm being pretty loud. Unfortunately, Sierra seems to be the same way--she recounts horrible, horrible dreams about all sorts of awful things. Sedona has recently started waking up crying as well.

This week's been particularly not fun (perhaps Granny was on to something...lots of Christmas sweets around). Sunday night I dreamed I was being held captive by Osama bin Laden. Just at the point where I was going to try escaping, Josh shook my shoulder to wake me up for the morning. In my dream, I thought Osama had me and I literally felt like I was going to have a heart attack. Had palpitations and everything. Last night was enough to make me less than eager to ever sleep again though. I dreamed Sierra, Sedona and I were on a set of stairs and Sedona managed to climb through the railing. I had ahold of one of her arms, then all of a sudden, it was like she split in two---one Sedona next to me and the other holding on to the rail, dangling in mid-air and screaming that high pitched, "I'm terrified" scream. Of course she's too little to hold her body weight and she immediately fell--two stories to a tile floor. I heard the thud, I saw her down there, the second Sedona that had been next to me was gone. I was so so so thankful when I tried to scream and no sound came out. I knew then that it was only a dream. Of course I was then wide awake and had to make sure my babies were okay. They were both snoozing peacefully. Sedona's diaper had leaked and her side of the bed and her pillow were soaked--she had scooted over and was snuggled up with her big sister. Unfortunately, momma's having a bit of a panic attack at the thought of sleeping again at all, much less sleeping an overwhelming 20 feet away from her.

2 comments:

One Acre Homestead said...

I'm so sorry you had that experience...those kinds of dreams bleed right into the day, don't they? I know when I have them I can't let the child I dreamt of out of my sight...afraid it was foreshadowing or something. I pray you have a peaceful, dream free sleep tonight!

The Hills said...

You know, I went to bed late and woke up early, but no nightmares and I feel SOO much more rested! Hoping that's the end of that for a while!

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