Sunday, July 5, 2009

The one where I get judgmental...

This has been festering in my edit list for a while, but it just kept getting longer, so I figured I'd go ahead and post it and then let it go ;-)

I try my best not to be judgmental. I spend an awful lot of time helping new families adjust to life with a baby and everyone of them makes some choice at some point that wasn't the choice that was right for me, so it's important for me to remember that their choices don't have to be my choices and that's okay. I admit, there are a few things (I'm sorry, but leaving your baby on the floor of Chick-Fil-A??) that I think are just wrong, but when there's gray area, I remember how much I value my freedom to make my own choices and do my best to extend respect to others when they make their's.

Lately, I'm kinda in a funk though. I make it a point to expose myself to things I disagree with (because I strongly believe that an idea that can't stand up to opposition is not an idea worth having...you should always challenge yourself to learn more and learn where other people are coming from). I was listening to some rather challenging talk radio a few days ago and really, some people are just.....what's the word? Oh yeah, bat $h!t crazy. Does it make it better if I disguise the swearing with punctuation? I listen to this same station 3 or 4 times a week and sometimes they come up with something that I can honestly think to myself, "you know, they have a point there." Other times, I want to gouge the radio out of the dash with my fingernails (so I give up on challenging myself and change the channel). Then there is that ever widening distinction between friend and acquaintance. And those people I'd really really like to keep in the friend category, but really, if I'm ALWAYS the one making contact, you can tell me you love me all you want and it starts to sound a little hollow. Let's see....there are the people who were completely normal up until about a year or two ago and have just completely gone off the deep end and the ones who will be wondering in about 12 years why their teenager dresses that way and never realize it's because they already burned through the "teenage-y, push the limits, skimpy" clothes at the age of 4. There are the people that should never ever have kids, but get pregnant at the drop of a hat and those that honestly think it makes no difference whatsoever if you boot a perfectly fit parent out of a child's life. Oh, and the people who honk because you actually wait for an opening before pulling out into traffic or have the audacity to drive the speed limit (sorry buddy, those are my kids in the backseat and I'll continue taking my precious time). Or the people who check the maximum number of movies out of the library, but never take their children (and their horrendous grammar) upstairs to visit the huge section of kid's books. And there are way too many parents who feel no need whatsoever to try to instill a sense of empathy in their kids---I honestly can't think of a more important life skill. As far as I'm concerned the development of character and morality hugely rests in a person's ability to put themselves in another person's shoes. Your kids shouldn't steal all the blocks because they can, they should refrain from doing so because it would make them sad if someone did it to them. And lastly, irresponsible adults in general. You get quite a bit of lee-way until you're 25 or so...then you need to shape up.

I need a serious injection of positive energy because these people are driving me up the wall and I'm gonna blow on someone who doesn't quite deserve it someday soon. If it wasn't so dang hot, I'd be packing up the family for a long, secluded weekend in the woods...somewhere without cell service or campsites.

6 comments:

One Acre Homestead said...

Yep, yep, and yep...all good points! I do hope I'm still on your good side, though... ;-)

I especially like the people who think you are sheltering your child if you don't let them watch the evening news. We are very careful about what the girls are exposed to at this point...I just think they're too young to see a lot of current news events and gory images. I do, however, take advantage of teachable moments like driving by a wreck last week...that's why we always wear our seatbelts and follow the driving rules, and why mommy can't help you while I'm driving. Safety first IMHO!

TennZen said...

You know what? I say KEEP ON PREACHING AND GETTING ANGRY! It seems like people are no longer listening to voices of reason and it's really a shame.

I see people just like you've described. I even know a few. It's all I can do to sit on my hands and not just choke the living shyt out of them because of what they're doing... or NOT doing, rather... for their children. "Parenting," indeed.

I just can't help but wonder when society took this big 180 degree turn from common sense to nonsense. Children need BOUNDARIES and NURTURING, not "choices" and "permissiveness."

No, sister, you keep on spreading the message. PREACH ON!

The Mama said...

I had to go run outside and check to make sure Jesus hadn't returned after reading this! Kimberly being judgmental...I never thought I'd see the day (wink)!

Not sure which category I fall into, but I hope I'm on your good side! I don't think I could handle the Wrath of Kimberly.

Creasy said...

Ahhhh... I needed that this morning. Thank you so much. The part about kids wearing teenage clothes at 4- I always wonder when I see those shorts that have "cute" written on the butt who designed them? I mean, honestly, how much do I want people looking at my two year olds butt long enough to read a slogan. And please don't get me started on high heels in a size toddler 5. Are you kidding me..... Ok, I need to stop now because I am not as non judgemental as you :) Oops, I just realized I am signed in as Aaron, but this is Vicky :)

Karen said...

I liked your post. I agree with you on many points. Thanks for venting about what I've wanted to vent about for a while now.

Robin Hawkins said...

Amen, sista!

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